Owning Her Story: Becoming by Michelle Obama

Should I be embarrassed to share that until I recently read Michelle Obama's memoir Becoming (2018), I hadn't really known too much about her history? Or that I didn't fully understand others' obsession and deep admiration of her?

Like many Americans, I reveled in the election of Barack Obama as 44th President of the United States, though I remained fearful and prayed for the family's safety throughout their eight years in the White House. While I admired the Obamas for what they symbolized, I wasn't obsessed with them. Other than a now defunct website dedicated to Mrs. O's fashion, I hadn't kept up with many of the articles or biographies that populated many shelves and websites since they first stepped into the national spotlight. Most of my perception of the Obamas came from reading 2/3 of Dreams from My Father (2007) way back when and whatever had made it in the headlines during their initial presidential campaign.

Having read Becoming, I'm actually pleased that my knowledge and understanding of Michelle's life came straight from Michelle, herself. No one else could have done as admirable a job of capturing her truth in the way that she did (particularly through her audio book), with honesty, humor, humility, grace, dignity, and authenticity. After all, as Michelle said, "Your story is what you have, what you will always have. It is something to own." Own her story is what she did in this memoir. I walked away more in awe of her than I thought possible. Role model, indeed, she is! I want to meet her.

In Becoming, Michelle presents her life in three parts: Part 1, "Becoming Me," details Michelle's childhood growing up in South Side Chicago with her mom, dad, brother, and great-aunts whose second floor apartment her family rented. Part 2, is "Becoming Us," in which she relates her relationship with Barack, describing the ways that family life was challenged by her career, and in particular, Barack's political aspirations. Lastly, in part 3, "Becoming More," she provides a glimpse into her experience as First Lady.

Part 1 is a particular favorite because the storytelling is superb. I was enraptured by the ways in which Michelle wove general American history with her own family's, specifically her grandfather's, whose experiences emphasized the ways in which systemic oppression robbed him of opportunities even as he hoped to realize them by migrating north in what is known as The Great Migration, brilliantly chronicled in Isabel Wilkerson's The Warmth of Other Suns (2010). I also loved the way Michelle threaded her brush with history during her teen years through her friendship with Santita Jackson. Stylistically, I loved that Michelle honored Santita as an individual before revealing that Santita is the daughter of Jesse Jackson whose historic presidential campaign in the 1980s Michelle experienced personally.

Lastly, I was struck by Michelle's ability to tie her own experience in school with that of many other Americans', particularly the poor and children of color, while subtly admonishing the American school system overall. "Failure is a feeling long before it becomes an actual result," she says of their experiences with school. This statement is true and profound. I love this section of the memoir because in "Becoming Me," Michelle powerfully conveys foundational truths about her upbringing: She comes from a hard-working, loving, supportive working class background, one in which she was raised "to be confident and see no limits, to believe [she] could go after and get absolutely anything [she] wanted"--and how that made all the difference.

Given the current administration and the deeply bigoted and divided state of the country, it was with anger, bitterness, and sadness that I read parts 2 and 3. I was saddened to see what's become of the hope that was sparked by Obama's initial run, inspired by his altruistic and possibly naive desire to do "good" for the American people; embittered by the systemic oppression, overt racism, and unequivocal disrespect that they faced; and angered by the politics of politics that explicitly worked to crush the Obamas for the entirety of their years in office. Compounding my anger was the contrast that emerged in Michelle and Barack's approaches to leading the country as President and First Lady: They took their roles seriously and worked hard to be accountable to the American people.

This is evidenced by Michelle revealing that, in addition to making time to read all the daily briefings required of him to effectively lead the country, Obama also required that twenty letters (positive and negative) from American citizens be included so that he could respond to them directly. Similarly, Michelle actively sought to elevate the voices and experiences of military families by visiting injured soldiers and advocating for them and their families to receive the care and benefits due to them for their sacrifices. Heartbreaking were some of the stories of injured soldiers that Michelle shares. Given where we are today, again, the systemic racism that the Obamas had to power through is enraging, particularly because their experience highlights what has always been the case in the United States: Mediocre white men automatically "win" whereas black and brown folks have to work twice as hard to get half as far. Bless Michelle and Barack for maintaining their grace, generosity, and optimism.

It's easy to become effusive in my review of the book, mainly because my assessment of Becoming is so rooted in my ability to personally relate to some aspects of Michelle's story. One in particular is the question she continues to grapple with despite seeming to have achieved it all: "Am I good enough?" Every black and brown girl, in particular, contends with this question daily. To think that Michelle continues to ask herself this question added to my feeling that she is the relatable family member I could be having a conversation with on the couch. It's not in error that I refer to her as Michelle: I came away understanding that she is not different from me. She is simply a woman who found herself in extraordinary circumstances and because she had such a strong foundation, she was prepared to open the door to opportunity when it knocked.

Michelle LaVaughn Robinson Obama is a national treasure and deserving of all the honor that will be bestowed upon her as part of her legacy. Becoming should now be part of the literary cannon.